One other thing that happened at Comic-Con that I found very interesting, being an admitted LOTR nerd, was Peter Jackson and his discussion of The Hobbit. This is one of those stories that I haven't followed very much, because I want it to happen so badly and I want it to be as brilliant as the Lord of the Rings Trilogy was. He didn't mention much except that he has not decided who will play Bilbo Baggins and will not do so until the budget for the film is finalized. Jackson is producing this film and Guillermo Del Toro (Pan's Labrynth) will be directing. I read a little bit more about it the other day and saw that James McAvoy is a strong contender fo the role of Bilbo. Personally, I can't think of anyone better. I also read that Sir Ian McKellan would be returning as Gandalf! WOOHOO! I hope the film gods will bless Peter Jackson one more time and really let this happen. Check out this article and video featuring Peter all skinny! I've seen those "behind-the-scenes" segments on the LOTR DVDs so many times, I still get taken aback by seeing Peter looking more fit, but he does have the familiar beard back!
Last night we didn't get to the Marina for dinner, but the plan is to go there for tonight. However we did go to a place that reminded me of Merlotte's from True Blood. The food was terrific, but the people eating there and working there were of all sorts and the place looked like an old abandoned church. It was a bit surreal.
Today is the birthday party for my niece Camryn and I am glad that there are going to be a lot of people around today. I love coming to my sister and Brother-in-law's lake house, but when it is a smaller family get together--that is when I have a tougher time. Everyone is broken into couples (even the kids) and then there's me. My family never makes me feel left out or anything, it's my own personal insecurity. I see everyone in their happy couples and I am usually trying to be the life of the party, but I'm sometimes sad and just trying not to let it show. I think it might be kind of tough this year. I am stuck in this funk and I am really having a hard time getting out of it. I am another year older and Zane is about to start kindergarten. I feel like time is running out. I guess I know that there is just a little something missing in my life. There is nothing I want more than to meet someone I can spend my life with. Someone I can trust. Someone funny. Someone with a good job. Someone who will be there for me and Zane when we need him. After the couple of conversations Zane and I had a few days ago, I feel an even stronger urge to find someone, but I don't even know where to begin any more. Things are different when you are the mother of a five year-old. Can't someone just call Rob Pattinson or Johnny Depp and tell one of them to come sweep me off my feet? Let's just pause to admire the two of them...shall we?
I'm also in a funk, because I need to find a steady job. There is nothing I love more than working at the theatre, but I know that they won't be able to keep me around forever. For a while my mother was encouraging me, but then knocked me down with depressing things she heard on the news. She was encouraging me that I would have an easy time getting a job as a substitute teacher and I had heard education was a safe job to get in to, so I began looking into it after graduation and was about to apply. Later, my mother said I might as well forget it because teachers with masters degrees were being turned down for substitute teaching positions in this crappy economy. I think I'll just apply and hope for the best.
I am just a worrier. I always have been. I lay awake at night worrying about money, paying bills, my child being old enough to go to school...Is Zane sleeping O.K. in his own bed? Is the new kitten sleeping in his litter box? Did I see a flea on Lily earlier? Did I put that zit cream on my face? Did one of my neighbors seem angry with me earlier? I hope I don't have a bad dream? Did I lock the front door?...the list goes on and on. I guess it's just the fact that my birthday is tomorrow and that always seems to make me much more contemplative. I truly am thankful I started this blog. It gives me an outlet and will hopefully help me sleep better at night. ;o)
Before the party began earlier, I learned my illness at the sight of blood is still very strong. Zane was playing with my step-dad and tripped over has own feet. He then fell and hit the edge of a tin tub that is used to hold drinks at parties. His tooth cut into his lip cut and he bled for a good ten minutes. I was OK holding ice on it until my mother said she was glad he didn't need stitches. I started shaking and felt queasy. I don't know if it was the sight of the blood or if it was just because that was my child.
I got a couple of cool gifts from my wonderful friends Joy, Randy, Anna and Cory. Joy made and AMAZING cake. It was Twilight themed and had an apple on it. It was also chocolate on chocolate. She and Randy also got me a photo album and a frame that say "Memories". Anna and Cory got me a very cool Family Guy card with Brian on it and a Rob Pattinson poster that will be going on the back of bedroom door as soon as I get home! So far it's been a good day and my birthday isn't really until tomorrow!
This is a little fun that Anna and I had with the fondant apple that was on my birthday cake!